A friend told me "scrambled eggs are basic" and I don't think he could be more wrong. Having served in the military, and also having moved all around the country, I can say I've had scrambled prepared all kinds of ways, and while I've had some decent scramblies, the best one is hands-down the kind I make.

The recipe is actually pretty basic, but that doesn't mean it can't be fucked up. I only use clarified butter, and I put a generous blop into a non-stick pan, then crank that heat and get the butter smoking hot. It's clarified, it can take it! Then you take your whisked eggs, however many you like, put them in the pan, and then immediately start pushing them around. Get the wet stuff folded in, it should only take about 45-60 seconds, and.. that's it.

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Nero Wolfe's cookbook will tell you to use watercress, which I haven't actually been able to try, but with some S&P and/or hot sauce - good stuff, Frank's is ok but really, get something better, you'll know it - it's better.

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